Secure

So sorry my hair is too curly,
So sorry my body is curvy,
So sorry that your eyes must see,
everything that creates me.

So sorry that I’m not enough,
or that I act a bit too rough.
So sorry you can’t understand
or accept me, the way I am.

So sorry that I felt this way,
So happy that my views have swayed.
Not sorry for being who I am,
instead grateful, I took a stand.

So happy that my hair has waves,
So happy I am now so brave,
enough to laugh off , all critique,
loving myself, being unique.

So happy that I never broke,
So happy I no longer choke,
I realized I was made perfect,
not put on earth for you to affect.

So grateful for all that I know,
So grateful I now run my show.
Teaching others, what life taught me,
not dictating how they should be.

– Grace Y. Estevez

Hope

Swallow my sadness
like it is a pill.
Exposing my heart
I stumble, it spills
.

Swift hollow dulled pain,
consuming my chest.
My smile shining bright,
inside I need rest.

Shadow of my soul
haunts me to the core.
The more I receive
further, I deplore.

Wallowing dim pride,
a well-disguised ploy.
To keep worries far,
behave like a toy.

Mirrored reflection,
intently I stare.
See my younger self,
then whisper I care.

Summon inner strength,
demand it to stay,
command it to grow,
with each passing day.


– Grace Y. Estevez

Pearl

A muted voice sings in your head,
the opaque words can not be read.
Loud blurry scenes live in your mind,
imagined lines left undefined.

Stardust hues create happy thoughts,
blinding both eyes from wars once fought.
Comfort your skull on silky sheets,
while all you seek is what you meet.


A glowing beam sets on your face,
shining your skin each waking day.
Sliding on rafts through streams foreseen,
living so posh, feeling so clean.

Melting my face in your deep eyes,
I meet myself, what a surprise.
All that I know, at once I see,
finding the key that lives in me.


– Grace Y. Estevez


Stand

Stand for your beliefs.
Do not allow others views,
to hide in your eyes.


– Grace Y. Estevez

Detach

I will not impose on your new life,
just need to know if you are alright.
Did you remember to turn off the lights,
and turn them back on when skies dim at night
?

Sorry to impose but I need to ask,
was this always you? Did I love a mask?
Does your heart still feel or has it turned black?
When did we become just another task?

Regret to impose, but just one more thing.
Now that I left, do you whistle and sing?
Have you discovered you now have new wings?
Is life much better, since you cut all strings?

Can not impose, with my eyes set on me,
no made up visions of what we should be.
Standing on my own, firm like a proud tree.
Floating like a wave that travels by sea.


– Grace Y. Estevez

Assured

Approval is given with just a look,
invisibly measured like reading a book.
Acknowledging smile appears in the eyes,
a wink or a nod may help to decide
.

Approval is given when one does not seek,
acceptance conveying what words can not speak.
Preferential treatment to those without care,
a pretty demeanor will keep people there
.

What is in it for me?, is often asked.
A heart that is pure but mind fully masked.
Fears always keep looming and dancing inside,
exposing all terrors that try hard to hide
.

Approval most given is rarely needed,
try to please them all but most are defeated.
The others are captured, engulfed in their thoughts,
displaying a shell, hoping it is bought
.

Approval once given is thrown in the trash,
grab what is offered then leave in a dash.
Forgiving it all for perceived approval,
erasing all doubts, drowned ego removal
.


– Grace Y. Estevez



Capability

Would you pass a tissue,
or wipe off someones tears?
Would you speak from your heart,
or freeze from anxious fears?

Would you feed from your core,
a good lesson you learned?
Would you pass by quickly,
walking too scared to turn?

Would you run from the truth,
you have hidden inside?
Would you escape yourself,
find a new place to hide?

If I behave offbeat,
would you run from me too?
If I search for answers,
would you throw me a clue?

If I aim for self care,
should I burn from pure guilt?
If I think my own thoughts,
will it break what we built?

If I start to comply,
change my image for you?
If I loose who I am,
will I still be called true?


– Grace Y. Estevez

Game over

I do not wish to play your game,
the twisted webs drive me insane.
Must hear your thoughts before expressed,
all interactions turn to dread
.

I do not want to play your game,
no room for change, always the same.
Riddles and clues shoved in my head,
clear expectations, mixed instead.


I do not need to play your game,
never believed in placing blame.
If something cracks, I look inside,
no need to point or try to hide.

I do not know rules for your game,
laws often change without an aim.
People are pawns, your words cruel darts,
all set to play misguided parts.

I will no longer play your game,
intentions pure, no need for shame.
No more pretense or need for lies
to self preserve, I say goodbye.

– Grace Y. Estevez

Phoenix

Feeling so used,
but still refuse,
to be subdued,
by an excuse
.

Feeling so hallow,
but will not wallow,
in any sorrow,
search for tomorrow.

Feeling so wrong,
will not prolong,
must skip along,
my heart beats strong
.

Feeling so mellow,
embracing yellow,
erase the echoes,
start hearing cellos.


Feeling alive,
dreams take a drive,
ambitions fly,
way past the sky.

Feeling so ready,
emotions steady,
negative buried,
life will be merry.

– Grace Y. Estevez

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