Contrary

Manipulates me,
treats me with love too,
swaying what I see,
controlling my views.

Energy displayed,
is covered in blades,
cuts straight through my heart,
splits spirit apart.

Shoots like a cold gun,
penetrates my lungs,
takes away my breath,
leads me towards death.

A fingerless touch,
delivers the punch,
imprints in my mind,
bruising deep inside.

Chews up all my pride,
leaves me undefined,
then holds me so sweet,
sweeps me off my feet.

I fly in the breeze,
my mind fills with peace,
the armors soon fall,
my trust starts to crawl.

The words I now hear,
erases my fears,
sent from up above,
my heart fills with love.

Tears flutter my eyes,
brings in butterflies,
they give me a hug,
that pulls to then tug.

Hear songs in my ears,
dismissing my fears,
my hopes climb up high,
sailing past the sky.

Hold lessons I learned,
experience earned,
watch regrets erase,
as guilts are replaced.

Past actions drop dead,
with phrases once said,
words fall on their knees,
soul flows like the sea.

Reaches no amends,
know this must now end,
the knots all untie,
I say my goodbyes.

– Grace Y. Estevez – Reddy

Originally Published on January 22, 2021

Opened Eyes

What can I do,
with no one left?
I trusted you,
you failed the test.

You told me I could open up,
lips that are sealed, never erupt.
I put my faith in our strong tie,
blindsided by all of your lies.

What should I do,
standing alone?
To split in two,
hurts to the bone.

I thought we shared a sacred bond,
that would outlast life and beyond.
You know me better than I do,
and just the same I know you too.

What will I do
all by myself?
Begin all new,
step off the shelf.

Know that my thoughts are safe and true,
appreciate how much I grew.
Moving along gathering clues,
navigate life, create new views.

– Grace Y. Estevez – Reddy

Serenity

Release stressful ties.
Clear toxic relationships.
Live happy in peace.

– Grace Y. Estevez – Reddy

Almost Perfect

A little boy with a big dream,
to live a life that feels supreme,
he always had strong self esteem,
wearing a smile that shines and gleams.

Trying so hard to find his match,
a pretty blonde the perfect catch,
they hit it off both hearts were snatched,
but differences made love dispatch.

On a new day he met a girl,
with distinct features, a rare pearl,
instant connection combined worlds,
but he did not like her dark curls.

Inside so perfect, but her looks,
were not the picture his goals took,
their true love story could write books,
but physical draws became hooks.

She wore a wig to bring him joy,
but felt just like a plastic toy,
she shrugged it off ” he’s just a boy”,
but deep inside she felt destroyed.

He never thought about her likes,
assuming he made heart rates spike,
she never focused on dislikes,
instead she thought they were alike.

Through thick and thin they achieved goals,
while balancing secure plateaus,
watching their passion swiftly grow,
a love so pure it’s essence glows.

In time their reflections had changed,
the mirror had suddenly aged,
insecure thoughts, all dead and caged,
egos old hooks were disengaged.

– Grace Y. Estevez – Reddy

All over again

Another chance,
to break my heart.
Another trance,
strong will departs.
Another glance,
make options smart.
Another dance,
forms a new start.

Brace my being,
for what will be.
Brace the feelings,
I let fly free.
Brace for meetings,
to hear sad pleas.
Brace the healing,
of you and me.

A better try,
lets go of fears.
A hope so high,
dries up old tears.
A joyful cry,
rings in my ears.
A dream that flies,
guides every year.

Time to forget,
and throw away.
Time to regret,
all selfish ways.
Time to offset,
a darker place.
Time to just let,
light fill all days.

– Grace Y. Estevez – Reddy

Listen

The sounds of my thoughts transcend to a sword,
that flaps in my mouth, igniting a war.
It rings through your ears,
as my mind you hear,
while my sacred knowledge,
conquers your great fears.

The sounds of my thoughts are somewhat absurd,
they scream in my head, mute songs mouthed unheard.
Their lyrics are brave,
transmitting airwaves,
while swaying the doubts,
that kept them enslaved.

The sounds of my thoughts, I must now accept,
be true to myself, old memories swept.
Inhaling the fumes,
as my life resumes,
with no sense of doom,
new stories assumed.

– Grace Y. Estevez-Reddy

Toy

Mold me like a plastic doll,
hold my hand so you feel whole.
Tie my shoes and dress me up,
let me drink straight from your cup.

Loving me for “Who I am”,
bending me to your command,
erase owned views from my eyes,
so your esteem can fly high.

Satisfy your needs and wants,
disregard any response.
Selfish ways arrogant acts,
blind your eyes to foreseen facts.

Plastic feelings separate,
fester slowly into hate,
slowly love disintegrates,
pretend smiles make it all great.

Accept me as I do you,
knowing my love was all true,
feelings obstruct my clear views,
unknown journey without clues.

Watch my eyes reflect my soul,
regain power, gain control.
Pull the anchor, sail my boat,
let it go, so true self floats.

– Grace Y. Estevez – Reddy

Line

With the last tear in my eye,
in frustration asking”Why,
did I play the game of lies?”
forming daydreams out of sighs.

Why did I believe and care,
while your heart was never there?
Gave you all I had to bear,
in exchange for your blank stare?

Why was I the one to try?
always looking for bright sides,
swallowing every last cry,
just to please your stubborn pride.

Could it be I disliked me?
So I made your “wants” my “needs”,
letting you form what I see,
pretending to just agree.

With sundown in full moonlight,
a clear tug felt warm inside,
giving my heart pure insight,
so my soul could fully guide.

I will always be your friend
without need to play pretend,
knowing true love never ends,
and my boundaries won’t extend.

– Grace Y. Estevez – Reddy

Lost and Found

Wrapped in sorrows,
few words spoken.
Saddened stale years
served as tokens.

Sweetest gestures,
strung love along.
Flung wicked words
forever strong.

Listened to lies,
new ones each day.
Danced in spotlights
as anguish played.

Spewed blank phrases
no conviction.
Blown air kisses,
contradictions.

Captured tears bring
self-affliction.
Apologies,
formed addictions.

Standing prepared,
fully withdrawn.
Making this time,
the final straw.

Feeling ready
to let this go.
Slowly sculpting,
a grand plateau.

Glimmering eyes,
smiling so bright.
Inner hues shine,
new found delight.

– Grace Y. Estevez – Reddy

Adios

Forsaken by your simple mind,
makes my life dance,

I wave goodbye.

Your selfish ways, simply unkind,
desperate to take

what others find.

I elevate so you can sigh,
all eyes are shut

or simply blind.

The games you play are well outlined,
manipulate

until confined.

Entrapment with no reason why,
to entertain

your hidden side.

You like to laugh as others cry,
seeing through you
,
hurts me inside.

Unknowing all you chose to hide,
so glad that I

opened my eyes.

I hold my tongue, release all binds,
no wish for luck
,
or evil grind.

Our lives no longer intertwine,
not looking back,

the past reminds.

Instead, my heart chooses to fly,

under the sun,
feeling divine.

– Grace Y. Estevez-Reddy

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