Assured

Approval is given with just a look,
invisibly measured like reading a book.
Acknowledging smile appears in the eyes,
a wink or a nod may help to decide
.

Approval is given when one does not seek,
acceptance conveying what words can not speak.
Preferential treatment to those without care,
a pretty demeanor will keep people there
.

What is in it for me?, is often asked.
A heart that is pure but mind fully masked.
Fears always keep looming and dancing inside,
exposing all terrors that try hard to hide
.

Approval most given is rarely needed,
try to please them all but most are defeated.
The others are captured, engulfed in their thoughts,
displaying a shell, hoping it is bought
.

Approval once given is thrown in the trash,
grab what is offered then leave in a dash.
Forgiving it all for perceived approval,
erasing all doubts, drowned ego removal
.


– Grace Y. Estevez



Capability

Would you pass a tissue,
or wipe off someones tears?
Would you speak from your heart,
or freeze from anxious fears?

Would you feed from your core,
a good lesson you learned?
Would you pass by quickly,
walking too scared to turn?

Would you run from the truth,
you have hidden inside?
Would you escape yourself,
find a new place to hide?

If I behave offbeat,
would you run from me too?
If I search for answers,
would you throw me a clue?

If I aim for self care,
should I burn from pure guilt?
If I think my own thoughts,
will it break what we built?

If I start to comply,
change my image for you?
If I loose who I am,
will I still be called true?


– Grace Y. Estevez

Necessary

I come to you, heart on my sleeve,
to say farewell before I leave.
To lay the truth out on your hands,
in hope that you could understand.
I trust that we will be just fine,
once I express thoughts on my mind.
In breaking down our concrete wall,
all issues will instantly fall.

I look at you, feeling dismay,
as your eyes do not look the same.
Your face became a hollow mask,
as if my presence is your task.
My ego rises as I see,
your smile wants to belittle me.
My words come out a jumbled song,
absorbing peace and feeling wrong.

Regain my self control once more,
antagonizing looks ignored.
Came here this time to make things right,
final goodbye without a fight.
Am doing this to close old ties,
without the need for petty lies.
You have your path and I have mine,
both living happy distinct lives.

– Grace Y. Estevez



Phoenix

Feeling so used,
but still refuse,
to be subdued,
by an excuse
.

Feeling so hallow,
but will not wallow,
in any sorrow,
search for tomorrow.

Feeling so wrong,
will not prolong,
must skip along,
my heart beats strong
.

Feeling so mellow,
embracing yellow,
erase the echoes,
start hearing cellos.


Feeling alive,
dreams take a drive,
ambitions fly,
way past the sky.

Feeling so ready,
emotions steady,
negative buried,
life will be merry.

– Grace Y. Estevez

Span

It hurts so much
to grow up fast,
realizing childhood
could not last.
Unchain myself
from memories,
of aimless days,
sweet melodies
.

It stings so much
to open eyes,
engulfed in chores
with no surprise.
Grown bitterness
of a routine,
no lingered songs
in harmony.

Your life becomes
required lists,
a pointless chase,
you must persist.
Racing against
a time now gone,
only know rest
after you yawn.

It feels so good
to live carefree,
erase visions
of what should be.
Be grateful for
the people near,
so heart felt laughs
can reappear.

Be glad that you
still have today,
knowing that life
can always change.
See yesterday
as needed steps,
since lessons learned
bring great effects
.

– Grace Y. Estevez

Self aware

Frustration grabs a hold of me.
It shakes me till I can not see.
While blocking off my clarity,
a forceful negativity.

Day dream of days when all was fine.
Realizing flaws were in my mind.
The things I longed for, I now have,
yet some how still attract contrast.

A voice in me scolds my dark side,
outlining why it should subside.


“Be grateful for the gifts you own,
and miracles you have been shown,
remember there is nothing owed,
mere bleak attempts to veer your road.”


Unbinding me, now feeling calm.
Unblinding hope, held in my palm.

I take a step to breathe deeply,
in efforts to release freely.
Regain my positivity,
bring myself back entirely.

– Grace Y. Estevez



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